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mysticsavage: Someday, I'd like to really be as funny as I think I am.

mysticsavage: Someday, I'd like to really be as funny as I think I am.

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mysticsavage: Full lunar eclipse visible tomorrow at 6 a.m. from western US:...

mysticsavage: Full lunar eclipse visible tomorrow at 6 a.m. from western US: http://t.co/EMrLE9XJ

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mysticsavage: http://t.co/QUpVBi1G #RickPerry Straight from Jesus.

mysticsavage: http://t.co/QUpVBi1G #RickPerry Straight from Jesus.

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mysticsavage: My Ricardo Montalban impression sounds like Vincent Price....

mysticsavage: My Ricardo Montalban impression sounds like Vincent Price. #firstworldproblems

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mysticsavage: Browsing through my friends' user photos on Facebook, looking...

mysticsavage: Browsing through my friends' user photos on Facebook, looking for the ones with Fetal Alcohol Syndrome.

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mysticsavage: We're playing Indian Rope Burn. I have a lot of skin in the game.

mysticsavage: We're playing Indian Rope Burn. I have a lot of skin in the game.

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mysticsavage: RT @SteveMartinToGo: Now that my war on Christmas is over, I...

mysticsavage: RT @SteveMartinToGo: Now that my war on Christmas is over, I can begin my war on New Years.

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mysticsavage: Hmmm...would I rather puke in church or barf at a family...

mysticsavage: Hmmm...would I rather puke in church or barf at a family reunion? It's a toss-up.

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mysticsavage: Grandma's putting all her cookie-baking supplies back in...

mysticsavage: Grandma's putting all her cookie-baking supplies back in storage until next year. #FloursInTheAttic

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mysticsavage: According to @klout, I'm influential about Coffee, Creativity,...

mysticsavage: According to @klout, I'm influential about Coffee, Creativity, and Food http://t.co/YkWDjdgo

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mysticsavage: RT @ramisalame: I don't know what crime the alphabet has...

mysticsavage: RT @ramisalame: I don't know what crime the alphabet has committed, but it's been serving sentence after sentence for thousands of years.

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mysticsavage: According to CNN, Romney's on top. Hmm... I would have sworn he...

mysticsavage: According to CNN, Romney's on top. Hmm... I would have sworn he was a bottom.

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mysticsavage: I'm so turned on by silk...hard up for material.

mysticsavage: I'm so turned on by silk...hard up for material.

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mysticsavage: She keeps pushing the envelope, but I still prefer postcards.

mysticsavage: She keeps pushing the envelope, but I still prefer postcards.

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mysticsavage: I can't think of a single occasion when I might actually call...

mysticsavage: I can't think of a single occasion when I might actually call someone a "Space Cowboy" even if he is speaking of the pompitous of love.

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mysticsavage: @PA_Megacorp, your Klout Score is 49 (I'm a 49). Check out your...

mysticsavage: @PA_Megacorp, your Klout Score is 49 (I'm a 49). Check out your @klout profile today! http://t.co/PddvRqos

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mysticsavage: @ferretthimself Go you, Mr. Ferrett!

mysticsavage: @ferretthimself Go you, Mr. Ferrett!

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mysticsavage: 10, on why she should have a pet raccoon: "It's perfectly...

mysticsavage: 10, on why she should have a pet raccoon: "It's perfectly dangerous and cool -- just like me!"

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mysticsavage: A couple from Madrid showed up tonight to crash on our couch....

mysticsavage: A couple from Madrid showed up tonight to crash on our couch. We were taken by surprise, but then, no one expects the Spanish Imposition.

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mysticsavage: @mitdasein hola. hola. hola. hola. hola. Hah! Got you there! No...

mysticsavage: @mitdasein hola. hola. hola. hola. hola. Hah! Got you there! No one expects the Spanish repetition!

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